Yes, BBC3 has started to air trailers and release photos for the forthcoming second series of the rather splendid Being Human. And it's all go! So far we've had a short promo for Mitchell, George and Annie and a longer trailer featuring all three characters.

Mitchell's Trailer



George's Trailer



Annie's Trailer

 

Series Trailer



The series has also launched a fictional meta-site based on CenSSA - the Centre For Study Of Supernatural Activity - which presumably is an organisation embroiled in the new series' stories.

This year we get eight episodes, with creator and writer Toby Whithouse providing the first two opening episodes and the last two episodes of the series. Directors Colin "Tumbling' Teague, Kenny Glenaan and Charles Martin have overseen the new adventures of Mitchell, George and Annie and the series is promising stories of a much bigger scale, darker and more disturbing.

A short 'prequel' movie has also been released to introduce two new characters in the series, Ivan and Daisy...SPOILERS INSIDE!!!



And finally a couple of publicity shots (I'm very jealous of Lenora's saucy Russell and Aidan sandwich)



Series 2 starts Sunday January 10th, 2010 at 9.30pm on BBC3. Come back for more on Being Human and a full series review. And here are the Series One Reviews  Check out one of the best blogs about the series here

BBCHD - 28th and 29th December 2009 - 9.00pm

You can't help loving a good bit of dystopia, can you? You wait for years for a bit of sci-fi 'end of the world' misery to show up on the telly and then the floodgates open. First, the BBC revived Survivors with reasonable success and tapped into the whole bird/swine flu (select the mammal of your choice) paranoia and now they've dusted off one of the great British Cold War science fiction novels, John Wyndham's The Day Of The Triffids and thrown what looks like a huge ton of cash at it.

Thanks to Crisperanto for the link to this fantastic archive interview from the BFI's You Tube Channel. This is one of Bernard Braden's Now And Then interviews from 1968. A selection of these made their way to a Channel 5 series last year I believe and the BFI currently looks after all of the existing footage that Braden shot. Some of the interviews have been released as extra features on their Flipside DVDs.

Thanks to the BFI.



This is a fascinating and respectful interview with Crisp. Braden asks some very interesting questions.
The DVD of The Naked Civil Servant, the book that Braden asks about at the beginning of the interview, has just been re-released by Network and the DVD of An Englishman In New York has also just been released by ITVDVD. Both essential purchases.

ITV1 - 28th December 2009 - 9.00pm

As Phillip Steele, the editor of the Christopher Street paper, tries to explain to Quentin in ITV1's superb drama premier, An Englishman In New York, he is an inspiration to a generation of gay men. Like Steele, when I first saw the broadcast of The Naked Civil Servant on Thames on the 17th December 1975, squirming rather embarrassingly in front of my mother and father at the time, I recognised a kindred spirit. That film said 'there are other people like you in the world' and that was good enough for me. The Naked Civil Servant remains a milestone in British television drama and Richard Laxton's sequel, for want of a better word, should quite rightly be praised and remain undiminished next to the original.

The new two part adaptation of John Wyndham's The Day Of the Triffids debuts tonight on BBC1 at 9.00pm. Here are three preview clips and a selection of promotional stills.







From the BBC Press Release:


Dougray Scott, Joely Richardson, Brian Cox, Vanessa Redgrave, Eddie Izzard and Jason Priestley star in The Day Of The Triffids, written by Patrick Harbinson (ER, Law & Order). This epic, apocalyptic and futuristic two-part drama is a co-production between Power and Canadian producer Prodigy Pictures for BBC One.

This exciting, fast-paced drama is based on John Wyndham's best-selling post-apocalyptic novel, The Day Of The Triffids, published in 1951. In the not too distant future, man's search for an alternative fuel supply leads him to uncover the ominous Triffid, a crop now cultivated for its fuel that seems to have a life of its own. But when spectators gather worldwide for a much anticipated solar storm, billions are left blinded and the few sighted survivors watch as society collapses into chaos.


The Triffids, meanwhile, find their way out of captivity. Free to roam the planet with a fatal sting, and a retributive taste for human flesh, the Triffids begin rapid breeding. Now Dr Bill Masen (Dougray Scott) must lead the brave in their epic battle against the Triffids' reign of terror in what could be the last days of mankind.



Julie Gardner, Head of Drama, BBC Wales, adds: "The incredible cast lined-up for The Day Of The Triffids is testament to the quality of Patrick Harbinson's script. We hope audiences, both old and new, will be captivated by this modern take of John Wyndham's classic best-selling novel."

Official site


I'll be reviewing it later.

S P O I L E R S     A H E A D

A preview clip from The End Of Time Part 2, coming January 1st on BBC1, released by the BBC features a post Time War Gallifrey and the Time Lord President meeting with his Council:



There's also a trailer that's currently airing on BBC1:



And finally the 'Next Time' preview tagged onto Part 1 of the story:

BBCHD - 25th December 2009 - 6.00pm

I suspect Part One of The End Of Time is going to be one of those 'marmite' episodes. You either love it or you really hate it. With the latter camp I can almost sympathise because the episode is far from perfect and certainly has its faults. But there are moments when it soars and breathtakingly scales the heights. Part of the problem with Russell T Davies' script is that it's entirely comprised of build up to the story proper, and I don't think that kicks into gear until Part Two, and all we are left with is much scene setting as the narrative bounces around for about half an hour before settling into something resembling a plot. And not a terribly good one at that.


There's also a strange tone to the whole episode, suffused as it is with a religio-political theme, telling the tale of the rise of an Aryan Time Lord and his fascist monoculture, a suggestion of some kind of Holy war in heaven between the Doctor and the Master and then the emergence of a reactionary, equally right wing, High Council of Gallifrey. The well used, post 2005 theme of faith in the Doctor is seeded into the story right at the beginning when Wilf enters the church and is told the story of the 'sainted physician' coming to Earth and 'smoting the demon'. Heavy handed religious symbolism isn't one of RTD's strengths and he's quite unfocused here struggling to articulate the bigger ideas about the Far Right's rise to power and our worries about the political direction the world has taken about war and peace, about the respect for liberty and diversity, and on the equitable development of nations.

The story's framing narration by Time Lord President Dalton is an attempt to once again place the events in the story on a global, nay this time, (Who)niversal scale. It sees the resurrection of the Master, rampant with narcissistic greed and acquisition, billionaire Naismith's 'Fighting The Future' post Torchwood manifesto realised as a home grown capitalism ('the king is in his counting house') with a multinational reach to acquire alien technology and a Time Lord army striking out in a "victory for Gallifrey" frontal assault on its intended targets who are a weak and divided Doctor and Wilf and a united and insurgent world of Masters.


The problem is that for a great deal of screen time a lot of this is lost amongst long scenes of exposition set on the Ood Sphere (which simply serves to recap the story of The Last Of The Time Lords), lots of scenes of David Tennant and John Simm running, and an extremely silly Harry Potter meets Prisoner Cell Block H convergence with the scenes set in the women's prison. It's here that any resemblance to coherent plotting goes right out of the window with the resurrection of the Master by the Governor (looking very much like Prisoner Cell Block H's Erica Davidson but minus the Lady Penelope posh accent) and the officers of Broadfell, including a Joan 'The Freak' Ferguson lookalike in Miss Trefusis. I was half expecting Alexandra Moen's Mrs Saxon to at least tell them all to 'rack off!' at the thought of bringing her husband back to life.

Extremely dubious occult reincarnation aside (the Secret Books Of Saxon, some rather horrible blue looking liquid and a trace of Boots No 7 lipstick), it's Mrs Saxon's convenient and long winded retort to all of this camp nonsense 'And I was never that bright but my family had contacts. People who were clever enough to calculate the opposite' that glaringly show up RTD's crass pulp pretensions as she is handed the anti-reincarnation potion, hurls it at Harry and blows Broadfell to pieces. Incredibly silly stuff but a very guilty pleasure.

How this translates into giving the Master X Men like powers or a predilection for hamburgers isn't properly explained. John Simm flying around and hurling lightning bolts at the Doctor is simply window decoration until we get to their face off proper. It's redeemed by the sweet Bernard Cribbins and his Silver Cloak agents tracking down the Doctor and sparing us any more long takes of Tennant and Simm running around derelict dockyards. Minnie pinching the Doctor's bum is a wonderfully irreverent moment.


At the heart of the episode is that scene in the cafe. An intimate duologue between the Doctor and Wilf that demonstrates RTD's real gift for economy and dialogue, exposing the heart of the story, and that sits like an ocean of calm in this sea of bombast. Cribbins is an extremely skillful actor and dominates the scene but Tennant matches him in that rather sorrowful moment of verisimilitude with the 'some new man goes sauntering away' line. It's further compounded by his confession that he' did some things and they went wrong' as a reference perhaps to the events in The Waters Of Mars and it's very moving when Wilf reaches out to a clearly distraught Doctor who knows his time is up.


Simm as The Master also mirrors a similar scene from The Last Of The Time Lords in which the Doctor wistfully remembered the glories of the citadel on Gallifrey, but here describes their youthful freedom in the fields of Gallifrey, and then echoes Wilf's tearful cry of 'look at us now'. Finally the Doctor does hear those drums pounding in his enemy's head and perhaps recognises it as a signal for the impending arrival of the Time Lords out of the darkness. Two peers meet in a derelict wasteland after two old men meet in a cafe. Two good scenes back to back.

Ultimately we end up back at Naismith's mansion, the Master trussed up like an intergalactic Hannibal Lecter, and he and his daughter's attempt to get the so called Immortality Gate operational. Back at the Noble household, Wilf arms himself and takes a ride in the TARDIS. A last companion for the Tenth, Wilf works delightfully well ('I thought it'd be cleaner' he says of the TARDIS interior) and there are some lovely light comedic moments as he runs off from Sylvia and leaves her talking to empty air. With all the pieces pushing into place, we're then introduced to the alien Vinvocci salvage team, sadly another weak and irrelevant component of the plot, and lots and lots of dull exposition from Joshua Naismith.


Once the Master has repaired the Gate and freed himself, the final ten minutes is utterly bonkers. And hilarious. The 'Being John Simm' sequence does outstay its welcome but the sight of multiple Masters jumping up and down, many of them in frocks and high heels, clapping and laughing as the entire population of Earth (including a poor Obama lookey-likey and Trinity Wells) is turned into the 'Master race', is bizarre, unsettling and very funny. What the Master is intending to do with an entire population of his selves and how Donna will survive her mind exploding recall as she sees this transformation is not yet clear but just as you think the titles are about to crash in, Spitting Timothy Dalton announces from his Phantom Menace senate building, packed with robed Gallifreyans, that the Time Lords are on their way. You'll have either laughed yourself silly by now or thrown a shoe at the telly and growled 'Barrowman!' with a clenched fist in the air. Personally, I spent most of the time doing the former.

Mad. Completely mad.


RTD's take on globalisation in The End Of Time proposes that ultimate power becomes concentrated around two symbolic figures of faith (the Master and the Doctor), that institutions (Gallifrey and the Time Lords, Naismith) become a corrupt force for decentralising the universe ('something vast stirring in the dark' that appears to want to actually 'end' time) and the people caught in the middle (Wilf and Donna) are left to try and affirm their cultural identities on an Earth run and populated by millions of blonde haired Nick Griffins. Wilf, for example, is radicalised by Claire Bloom's alternative Queen's speech, in a moment where as Alvin Toffler once noted 'if you don't have a strategy, then you end up being part of someone else's strategy' and as the episode hurtles toward its cliffhanger the imminent frying of Donna's mind suggests a woman once again emerging from passive acceptance of her lot to the restoration of the hard won independence of Series 4.

It'll be interesting to see a plot develop out of this string of events. Will the Doctor have to destroy the Time Lords all over again and sacrifice himself to do so? Will the Time Lords remove the Tenth from the time stream in a great big reset button? Will John Simm stop laughing?

Well, here we are again my lovely readers. Hurtling towards the end of 2009 and to the end of the Noughties. Another decade over and Christmas television isn't improving, alas. As I sit here, kicking the odd passing urchin, adjusting my wallet and wiping the digital snow off my screen (those new encoders on BBCHD playing up again), it's obvious from my browsing of the Radio Times that BBC 2 and Channel 4 appear to have closed down for Christmas or have simply forgotten what time of year it is.

It's clear that some broadcasters are doing a passable impression of Scrooge this season. Like those dinners on Christmas Day, we're being subjected to repeat after repeat. Even BBC 4 couldn't find sixpence to provide us with a seasonal new ghost story. Unless you count Orson Welles.

So, let me pour myself a Babycham and begin our heart to heart about this year's festive telly.

Christmas Eve
After a long absence Victoria Wood seems to have pulled her finger out and written Victoria Wood's Midlife Christmas to appease her masters at BBC 1. If this repeats the misfire of ...With All The Trimmings then Wood's muse has clearly abandoned her and shacked up with someone else or the real genius behind her craft was in fact the Great Soprendo after all. However, Julie Walters reprising the Bo Beaumont character and the Lark Pies to Cranchesterford skit that suggests she's aiming a few missiles at BBC 1's coma inducing bonnet saga indicates she might be back on course.

After that I suggest an early night to dull the effects of yet another Channel 4 schedule crammed with back to back editions of Come Dine With Me. 

Christmas Day
Cremate one bird, serve with root vegetables and lumpy gravy. As the sprouts begin to add to the general atmosphere of the front room, one drama casts a huge shadow over the BBC 1 schedule today. No, not Emmerdale. It is of course the much hyped farewell of the Tenth Doctor in Doctor Who. Listen, it features John Simm trussed up like Hannibal Lecter and bringing a whole new meaning to the phrase 'Master and slave' and for me that's good enough to hole the good ship Woolpack below the waterline good and proper. Time for a very quick sherry and switch to BBC 3 for Doctor Who Confidential and an hour of RTD ordering us to rend our garments or something. Reminder to self - will have to set the Sky box to record Strictly on the other side.

BBC 2 have simply stacked up a load of old repeats so don't bother with them. Have a doze whilst Eastenders is on so that you're fresh as a daisy for the The Royle Family Christmas Special and the last ever but one of Gavin And Stacey on BBC 1. As Ness would say, 'tidy'. And for heaven's sake record Grey Gardens on Channel 4. It's their best offering over the entire festive period. And it's got two bloody marvellous performances from Drew Barrymore and Jessica Lange. Silly they've ended up cancelling out each other's chances at the Golden Globes with their joint nominations in the Best Actress category. It's what happens when a drama just gets too camp for its own good.

Finally, you'd do yourself a massive favour too if you could catch the Arena on BBC 4. It's an archive airing for the much vaunted two part Orson Welles interview. It is a slice of pure documentary genius. Probably the best interview in the world. He said in a gravelly Welles type voice.

After that, collapse in a heap on the sofa and try and find one of those green triangular ones in the almost empty tin of Quality Street.

Boxing Day
Wake up with a massive hangover that requires an intravenous injection of coffee and Nurofen. Cries of 'to be or not to be' echo round the house and you'll realise it's not the other half contemplating what to do with the remains of the turkey but just a reminder that David Tennant's propping up the BBC 2 schedule with a filmed version of his RSC turn as Hamlet. It's their only decent programme this year. No expense spared, eh?

Then you might as well do a bit of hoovering until BBC 4 unleash Charlie Brooker with the Screenwipe Review Of 2009 or else you're left with a 1973 Morecambe And Wise Christmas Show on BBC 2 which is probably worth seeing just for the 'he'll not sell much ice cream going at that speed' line from Eric and for Vanilla Redgrave letting her hair down and having a bit of a laff with the lads. It's followed by The Story Of Slapstick which at first I thought was a programme about the Controller of BBC 2 but turns out to be something about "the universal language of comedy". Probably right in the first instance after all.

Retire to bed with a dirty book.

Sunday 27th December
So, so, so, so scandalous that the Cranford special on BBC 1 hasn't been set at Christmas. However, the second part of the this year's story is worth a look just to see how much gurning from under their bonnets Dames Imelda, Judi and Julia can manage. Classier than Larkpies anyhoo.

Over to BBC 4 for the second half of the Arena on Orson Welles. They had to make it in two parts cos the bugger was so bloody big. BBC 2 is doing a tribute night to Steve Coogan. Yes, well, don't call us Steve.

Monday 28th December
Christ, more schedule clashing! The combined heat from our Jodrell Bank lash-ups as they record this evening's programmes in the front room will likely melt the buttons on my flame proof nightie.
On BBC 1 it's the start of a two part adaptation of Day Of The Triffids. The Beeb have kept the titular plants under wraps and I'm left wondering if this is going to be a disappointment or end up as embarrassing as Paradox. Remember ITV 1...? Yes, they've actually got something decent on. Having sat on An Englishman In New York for a year (ooh, painful) the schedulers have donned their cravats and felt fedoras and taken Quentin's advice: 'Don't keep up with the Joneses. Just drag them down to your level. It's cheaper.' I am looking forward to this sequel to The Naked Civil Servant immensely.

Meanwhile BBC 2 offer a documentary on Not The Nine O'Clock News but still can't be arsed to sort out a complete re-run of the original series. On BBC 4, we're flying to the moon with the superb documentary For All Mankind.

Pour a large brandy and flick through a copy of Freshmen.

Tuesday 29th December
A bit quieter. If the CGI Triffids have turned out to be more fearsome than the, by now, sagging Christmas Tree then tune in for second part of Day Of The Triffids on BBC 1. BBC 2 pay tribute to entertainment icon and all round lovely woman Dame Whitfield in The Many Faces of June Whitfield plus an episode of Terry And June and an archive This Is Your Life. She's in Doctor Who you know. National treasure etc. If only she'd go against all expectations and reveal she's had several torrid lesbian affairs. Using sex toys. That'd upset all those middle Englanders. Sigh.

Wednesday 30th December
BBC 1 is having another go at adapting Henry James' superb ghost story Turn Of The Screw. Plus points for actually producing a bit of a scare fest for the season but it will have to work hard to match the superb The Innocents. There's also a 'making of' Victoria Wood thing called Victoria Wood: What Larks! that will no doubt pop up as an extra on the inevitable January 2010 DVD release. You're on twice over the season, Vic, so you shouldn't be complaining to the Telegraph about the shoddy treatment you received at the hands of the BBC. If indeed she did complain and it was in fact all complete anti-BBC Telegraph bollocks. Oh, yes.

New Year's Eve
A packed schedule of 'Noughties' themed programmes. How lovely. Two shows on Channel 4 will likely have you reaching for the creme de menthe are The Greatest Songs Of The Noughties (really, where there any?) and The Greatest TV Shows Of The Noughties which is very likely to end up as a wankfest over The Wire for an hour and forty odd minutes. I suggest a triple snowball to knock you into a coma as Big Ben's hands welcome you into 2010. You might hear several chimes from a clock tower in London whilst he's at it. Lovely fella, Ben.

New Year's Day
Cheer yourself up with lashings of camp innuendo. Phone the mother-in-law. No, take a gander at BBC 2's Are You Being Served tribute and wonder as modern technology puts the colour back in Molly's pussy gags. Bluer than ever, then. The pilot episode has been fiddled with and is now in colour courtesy of BBC boffin James Insell. There's an hour long documentary too which quite rightly enshrines the series as a truly guilty pleasure.

I guess we'll all be dabbing our eyes at 6.40 as BBC 1 unveils the final episode of Doctor Who to feature David Tennant. We don't know his fate but it's likely to be a ratings buster and will scar generations of kids for decades to come. Hah! Pop over to BBC 3 for the final RTD era Doctor Who Confidential and perhaps the very last time we'll see him and Julie say 'how marvellous' several hundred times whilst sitting in the same room grinning insanely. Hopefully you'll have recovered enough and rung out your hanky in time for the very last Gavin and Stacey later that evening. Don a black veil and go on a bread and water diet for ten minutes. Then stuff yer face with a big chocolate cake, drink several gin and tonics and then pray that the new season for 2010 has some decent programmes.  


I'll be back to review some of these fripperies under the influence of alcholic substances. You have been warned. Adieu.

BBC1 - 19th December 2009 - 5.45pm

A terrific closing episode that is actually not the bloated, special effects dominated epic I was half expecting it to be. It's rather a very intimate story about Merlin and his long lost father and the emotional impact of their separation is the core of the narrative here. The episode is significant for not only revealing who Merlin's father is but also features the departure of the Great Dragon, which alongside the disappearance of Morgana, makes some significant changes to the format of the series.


We're thrown straight into the desperate situation in Camelot as the dragon, now free, attacks the castle on a nightly basis, threatening to reduce everyone to toast. Even old Uther is seen cowering in his tower. Merlin, naturally, attempts to use his powers on the beast but isn't strong enough. That's when Gaius pipes up that they'll need the service of a dragonlord to rid themselves of the creature. But Uther has wiped out all of them, hasn't he? Not so, Gaius helped one man escape and in a tense scene, he reveals that the man he helped to freedom was actually Merlin's father, Balinor. It's a beautifully played moment in the episode and Richard Wilson and Colin Morgan as ever demonstrate their on screen rapport.

This knowledge weighs heavy on Merlin and the following scenes where he joins Arthur on a quest to find Balinor tease the audience something rotten, making us think that at any moment Merlin will confide in Arthur. The enduring sub-plot about their deepening friendship and trust really develops in this episode and works well at keeping several revelations secret from Arthur - the identity of Merlin's father and Merlin's own growing power. The story explores their growing trust of each other but still dangles these two plot points enticingly. However, the writers do seem to be in no rush to resolve those ideas just yet. I do wonder how long they'll keep this up as we're now two years into the series and Arthur still hasn't twigged Merlin's true nature yet. Even at the end of this story, he's not aware just how important Balinor actually is to Merlin.


Meanwhile, the dragon spectacularly belches fire over the knights of Camelot and continues to attack the castle. Brilliant effects from The Mill once again, particularly the close ups of the dragon in flight. Following a lead from a tavern owner, Merlin and a wounded Arthur stumble across Balinor in a remote cave. Balinor's played by John Lynch who truly brings a sense of ancient wisdom and power to the role. He and Morgan are excellent and the initial scenes between them where they are both figuring out each other, as Arthur lies in a coma and Merlin is in a state of nervous expectation at meeting his father, are well done. And there's no fooling Balinor who knows immediately that Merlin's master is Arthur Pendragon, the son of the man who attempted to destroy all the dragonlords.
We also find out that the dragon has a name, Kilgharrah, and that it was Balinor who brought the dragon to Camelot, believing that Uther wanted to make peace with it. Balinor obviously doesn't have much time for Uther or his kin so Merlin's job to persuade him to rescue Camelot is going to be difficult. It's obvious that he's going to have to confess to Balinor that he's his son. Again, Lynch and Morgan slowly tease out the scene, putting in subtly powerful performances, slowly building up to the moment when Merlin admits he is his son. It's a central scene that's the entire backbone of the episode and it's just two men sitting and having a conversation in a cave. That's confident scripting, directing and performing.

Meanwhile, there's also that nice little scene on the castle ramparts between Gwen and Gaius. Gaius is very savvy and knows about the growing feelings between her and Arthur and, despite her claiming that their relationship can never be, he offers hope in that the power of love should never be underestimated. Ahhh.


However, the episode has a tragic note in that Balinor is taken away from Merlin just as he agrees to journey to Camelot to help with the dragon problem. In enemy territory they're attacked and Balinor is fatally wounded. I know I'm sounding like a record stuck in a groove here but once again there's a beautiful scene between Morgan and Lynch where, as Balinor is dying, he bequeaths his power to his son. It dovetails beautifully with that rather gorgeous visual interpretation of the same when Merlin wakes up to see the carved dragon that Balinor was working on in an earlier scene. As this is happening, Merlin has to hide his tears and grief from an unsuspecting Arthur and it's very sad that he can't confide in his master as a true friend would. And in its own way, the episode is a rites of passage for Merlin as he moves from being Arthur's servant boy to become a man and a dragonlord like his father.


When Arthur calls upon the knights to volunteer for the task of slaying the dragon there is that lovely echo of the knights of the round table coming together in the way director Jeremy Webb shoots that scene. There is also the great interplay between Arthur and Merlin where there is a sense of a more mature Merlin advising Arthur and both submitting to their fates as true comrades. The fight with the dragon is like something from a great Ray Harryhausen film and is superbly done, offering a sense of scale and power to the creature. After Arthur bravely attacks the creature and his knocked out momentarily (of course they've got to keep this sub-plot going!), Merlin tames the dragon, with a Ben Kenobi type voice over from Balinor to guide him, and spares its life and banishes it from the kingdom. Epic stuff that Merlin as a series is so very good at doing. And Arthur has to take the credit, naturally. The swine.

A great finale to a batch of 13 episodes that has been a vast improvement on Series One. And so, roll on Series Three. I'll be back with reviews next year. Hope you've enjoyed this year's coverage.

Back in the summer, we all had a chance to go and see nearly 20 minutes of James Cameron's Avatar. Bold claims about Cameron's film being the dawn of a new cinematic age were, and continue to be, made. I came away from that preview distinctly underwhelmed and unsure that the film was going to be able to live up to such hyperbole. Now that I've actually seen it - and seen it in on an IMAX screen in 3D, as no doubt Cameron would have intended it to be seen - I'm still not convinced of Cameron's opinions of his own genius nor of the media hypocrisy to be found in the majority of reviews for the film. Why reviewers won't actually own up to the film's very obvious faults and the imperfections of the 3D techniques it employs continues to baffle me.


I'll agree that Avatar isn't completely the turkey we suspected it would be. It's a visually impressive experience but it's a hollow one. The word 'game-changer' keeps being bandied about. Well, yes, I can see it having an enormous influence on the 3D and effects heavy films of the future. However, Cameron has failed to make a good film despite having all the toys at his disposal that money can buy. It is the work of a technician, an obsessive attempting to see how far he can push the technology. The fact that his actions also shore up a multi-media industry that's still got a complex about film piracy and is also determined to find a way to thwart them and get bums back on cinema seats is one that Cameron clearly didn't overlook when Fox backed his film.


Let's get the first problem out of the way. The 3D certainly isn't what it's cracked up to be. Whilst it is some of the most impressive use of the format that I've had the chance to see and Cameron's special stereoscopic cameras have upped the game considerably (or changed it if we're sticking to the party line), I spent a great deal of my two hours and forty minutes constantly having to adjust the focus of my eyes and getting irritated by the motion judder still inherent in the image during fast movement. It is not perfect by any means but I will say that much of the film is an exciting and often impressive visual feast in 3D. However, that isn't completely to do with the 3D and everything to do with impressive visual effects. The film's visual potency lies in the leaps and bounds that it has made in creating realistic motion-capture characters. So, technically whilst I think 3D is still a gimmick, Avatar is gob-smackingly good to look at and the interaction between human and animated characters in a blend of location shot footage and photo realistic computer created jungles is justifiably stunning.


Secondly, 3D's gimmickry will only work when you've got a good script to marry it to. Avatar's script is really the weakest element of the film. Cliched and derivative, it is uniformly poor. The story is pretty simple and is rather slim to hang a 160 minutes of narrative on. Jake Sully, a paraplegic marine, is recruited by The Company to complete the task his brother was originally contracted to do. He arrives on the planet Pandora and is asked to go undercover to spy on the native inhabitants, the Na'vi. The Na'vi are very tall blue humanoids and to infiltrate them Jake has to be connected to an avatar, a synthesised body made of Na'vi and human DNA. The Company wants to relocate the indigenous tribes because they're sitting on a huge deposit of an energy producing element called 'unobtainium'. The plot descends into a Dancing With Wolves pastiche where Jake goes native, falls in love with a female Na'vi, Neytiri, joins the tribe in order to save them from nasty, white capitalists who want to plough over their rain forest and rape their 'earth mother'.


It uses every cliche in the book. Cameron even picks over the corpses of his previous films; the tough but sensitive female fighter pilot; the slimy Company man who won't listen to the warning from the scientists studying the Na'vi are both straight out of Aliens for example. As well as the rather earnest green platitudes about learning not to abuse the environment and being at one with Mother Nature, it's a very crude white man's racial fantasy to give the white protagonists an ability to shed their skin and 'black up' to become the Other. The viewer will find it easy to identify with Sam Worthington's character Jake Sully, as the skeptical white man, who dumps his capitalist/materialist American marine brainwashing to fulfill a rather predictable colonial fantasy of going native and leading his tribe against the aggressors to assuage us all of our centuries of colonial guilt.


The acting is reasonable considering that the characters are, forgive the pun, less than three dimensional. Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana and Sigourney Weaver all acquit themselves well enough but Stephen Lang as the gun toting Colonel Miles Quaritch is the biggest cliche of them all, a black hole of a performance that drags everyone else down to his scenery chewing level. Trouble is, he has no actual scenery on which to dine, it being virtual and all, and therefore he takes chunks out of his fellow actors as he ends the film literally as an unstoppable killing machine, raving and ranting and lacking any conviction. He's a very silly character and makes George Bush and Dick Cheney look positively sane. The other element that grates here is James Horner's score. Sadly, it too is a grab-bag of recycled elements, mainly his old scores for Aliens, Willow and Titanic, and the film stumbles on several occasions when the score distractingly indicates the horror that Celine Dion might at any moment suddenly burst into that song on the soundtrack. Even sadder, Leona Lewis gets that job over the end credits.


Whilst I can't see this turning into a huge hit of Titanic proportions, Avatar will no doubt be very successful. However, it will win no plaudits as an example of a story well told, performed or directed. Eye candy of a highly calorific nature, it is an amazing virtuoso technical exercise but cinema is as much an intellectual engagement with narrative as it is one concerned with visual spectacle and Avatar is simply a gaudy dumb-show without that engagement. The future of cinema, perhaps not, but for the video gaming industry I'd bet it's a red letter day.   

Avatar (Cert 12A. Released December 18th 2009. Directed by James Cameron)


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